| (no subject) |
[Mar. 11th, 2005|11:10 pm] |
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Ever get a very unexpected message from someone who you thought hated you, but in all actuality... they're glad you're happy and don't hate you anymore? Well I did... and it made me happy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 20th, 2005|11:21 am] |
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eh.. i love how your ex girlfriend calls you when she's drunk and tells you that she's "in love" with you still. love it. know what i love even more?! how they had your NEW cel phone number. yeah. love that too. blah blah blah... "they got it from someone else." i'm sure. |
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| hmm... |
[Feb. 14th, 2005|05:02 pm] |
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i'm usually against valentines day but... my boyfriend is so cute. i can't help but adore him. happy valentines day, babe.
( hah. ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 10th, 2005|04:45 pm] |
| [ | how's i feelin' |
| |  so guilty it's disgusting | ] |
| [ | jammin to |
| | taking back sunday. | ] |
And I'm not so sure
if I'm sure of anything anymore
Well this is the last night
that you'll be keepin'
secrets from me
-----------------------------
Well it's getting colder and you're getting distant
and I just keep thinkin
that I never meant it to be like this(to be like this)
You know what comes next(so do I)
You’re begging for a way to gracefully bow out
and say goodnight
It's worse than you think
On your way home you should have known
you never listen to me
I’m only complaining to keep myself busy, sweetie
I’m only complaining to keep myself busy, sweetie
Hm.. saturday is a very eventful day. I'm legally allowed to drive with people, I'm doing casey's make-up for tolo, baby-sitting for kayla's mom, and watching movies with Tyler. How exciting. Hopefully movie night will be better than last. I was irritated and not feeling well. Hopefully Tyler and his boss figure something out. 1'177 5325114774 15121157124730, 611435. 1 17330 501773 5325. 170111! If you can read that... I'm happy for you. I've been really not nice lately. Sorry everyone. It's the alternative school... I feel like I'm not getting anything done at all. Kinda stressful.
i've QUIT. everything. drugs, drinking, the whole shabam. i'm square now. woopee. eh...
Tyler says he'll give me the silent treatment if he finds out that I do anything that I've quit. That's SOME motivation... but it's not me to not do those things. It's just my way of livening things up.. I guess. Life is kinda boring without a little partying here and there. I may be corrupting him... he's going to be corrupted sooner or later... why not sooner? Shouldn't he be liking me for me, anyway? Whatev.
ANOTHER one of my friends may be pregnant. My uncle just had his child-- Mr. Rotondo for all of those that had him in junior high or as a wrestling coach. Tyler's sister is pregnant... and some other people that I'm really close with. If winter is like this.... what's spring going to be like? Jesus.
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| a mistake was made... |
[Dec. 27th, 2004|01:52 pm] |
when i stopped by lastnight to say happy birthday and to see how you were doing... i realized i made a mistake.
and i'm going to stop myself before i say anything else. |
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| i'm a tad bit spoiled. |
[Dec. 24th, 2004|11:48 pm] |
i got a fucking REFRIDGERATOR. my family will NEVER see me now. oh man.
a 3 diamond ring
speakers for my car
a camera/mp3 player/video recorder/sound recorder..
purses
socks!
money
scarves
elmo slippers
candy
a watch
clothes..
and that is all i can think of right now. this christmas was a good one. i still have ONE more to go.. tomorrow. before work.
speaking of work.. everyone should come visit me somewhere between 3 and 8... beacuse.. uhh.. you love me? |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 21st, 2004|06:13 pm] |
exploring will be fun.
our wrestling team placed 18 out of 32... not too bad.. but still pretty bad. only one person got injured though. i'm sure he didn't mind. all the trainers were hitting on him. haha. but he's a sweet boy.
christmas is in 3 days for me. i'm excited.
i'm pretty sure i have to work on christmas day...
so if you have nothing better to do...
you should go to the poulsbo regal and say hi. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2004|05:07 am] |
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YES! the fucking fiddle. FINALLY. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2004|05:04 am] |
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i'm a fucking insomniac. ian agrees.
we're all fucking insomniacs.
kayla included.
i totally spilled my guts to you earlier.
probably scared you off a bit,
but i guess it's better that you know.
you should be getting it by now.
why it took me so long to come around...
why i can't be involved sexually.
at least i hope you're getting it.
i obviously feel extremely different
toward you than you do toward me.
i'm still looking forward to winter break.
it'll be an adventure.
if you're still up to it, that is.
a friendship is worth more than an addiction. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 9th, 2004|06:58 pm] |
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my brother is a selfish dickhead. he gets married to a girl that he claims he loves and decides that he wants to join the military. he would like to joing the marines, but now is forced to join the airforce because he's not able to send money home to her so she can basically survive with her daughter. he's willing to kick his wife out of the house and get a divorce to make himself happy and join the military. what a fucking prick. he threatens to "beat the shit out of her" and "fuck her up". just like he does me. you don't treat your wife with disrespect. he should just kill himself. seriously. what is he still alive for? he's not a good parent, husband, brother, or son. why is he still on this earth? what?! hell doesn't even want him? someone take him. i sure as hell don't want him. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 9th, 2004|06:30 pm] |
give me space.
i can't breathe.
you're smothering me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 4th, 2004|10:03 pm] |
uh... sorry shopping sucked.
when i got home i was about to ask my mom if i could stay the night at "kaylas" house because i felt bad and i wanted to spend more time with you. some time alone. not in the mall walking, but on your bed laying. maybe even sleeping this time. maybe next weekend?
today was missing something. probably your voice. i heard you talk a total of 5 times. i'm going to go to sleep now. have a good night. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 3rd, 2004|07:56 pm] |
my brother fucking punched me today...
and also decided that it would be fun to slap me.
all because i had the shoes that my dog pissed on on top of the washer. he obviously didn't like them there, so i told him to buy his own damn washer. he didn't like that comment, so i told him to fucking move out. everyone would be so much happier. kinda like the feeling while on cocaine. yeah. that would be the same feeling i would get if he were gone for good. what the fuck is his problem? i swear to god i'll call the cops on him if he does it again. this has happened one too many times. i told him that i would, then he just started yelling more. "threaten me again! do it. see what fucking happens." he was just yelling because he was scared that i was going to do it. i seriously hate him. he can join the airforce. i hope his jet crashes. amaya and nicole will be taken care of. someone just kill him. i won't miss him, i promise. i was so pissed off that i was shaking. and now i have a headache. probably from being hit. maybe even from stress. who knows?
my week was total and complete shit. |
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| why? how? |
[Dec. 2nd, 2004|08:56 pm] |
how do you do it?
why now?
you say.. "5 months, allex."
rub it in.
make me want you even more.
you have bad timing.
or maybe i have bad timing.
should i be spending this time with you?
i don't know anymore.
i don't know if i should get involved with anyone.
i don't know if i want you.
i can see how this whole thing is turning out.
it's like every other relationship that i've had.
when someone is happy... the other is not.
argumentative... depressing... stressful.
--ends in heartbreak.
i can predict it.
i've become a pro.
sooo much is on my mind.
don't ask me about this post. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 30th, 2004|10:31 pm] |
... you will never understand.
i'm--
upset
sad
confused
depressed
hopeful
content
happy
concerned
everything
you
could
possibly
imagine. |
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| Ahem... |
[Nov. 30th, 2004|07:52 pm] |
It's Not Sex. It's ... :
Having a Bit of Sugar Stick
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aaand no... I will not tell you. Maybe later. Maybe. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 28th, 2004|07:05 pm] |
last night / this morning = wonderful.
your mom likes me. =)
that makes me happy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 26th, 2004|01:13 am] |
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i really wanted to kiss you. |
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